A MARKET-NEUTRAL, CROSS-VENUE CARRY strategy whose payoff IS the funding cash flow, not a directional bet gated on funding. For each of 8 never-traded alt perps that trade on BOTH venues (SEI, ONDO, ENA, TIA, RUNE, LDO, AAVE, NEAR), we run an independent, self-hedged 2-leg pair: SHORT the SAME COIN on the venue whose funding is rich and LONG it on the venue whose funding is cheap, equal USD notional, so the price exposure cancels and the residual PnL is (a) the funding differential received every hour and (b) the small inter-venue basis drift. There is NO cross-sectional ranking across coins and therefore NO alt-market beta — the structural difference from the abandoned 12-name Binance-only cross-sectional funding-carry basket, whose PnL turned out to be residual alt beta. ECONOMIC CAUSE: Binance USD-M funding is a clamped 8-hour rate on a deep arb-heavy book; Hyperliquid charges funding EVERY HOUR off an oracle/impact-price premium with a much wider clamp on a far thinner, retail/vault-dominated book. When positioning crowds on one venue the two funding clocks diverge for DAYS, because closing them requires simultaneous funded margin on a CEX and a perp DEX. MEASURED ON THIS FACTORY'S OWN CATALOG (2024-02 → 2026-09, 8 coins, 8bp/8h trigger, 7-day hold, non-overlapping): 161 pair-trades (322 legs, 62 entries/yr), mean carry +0.539%, mean basis PnL +0.025%, taker round trip 0.19% → NET +0.375% mean / +0.360% median per pair-trade, 81% net-positive, p10 −0.262%, worst −4.07%. Per-LEG ≈ 0.19% = 2× round trip. The effect is present in all 29 coin pairs scanned (carry +0.17% to +0.78%, positive fraction 0.74–1.00). CRITICAL: HL funding is PER HOUR, Binance PER 8 HOURS — compare only after summing the trailing 8 hourly HL observations, strictly point-in-time. Sizing: per-leg 30% of equity, ≤5 concurrent pairs, gross ≤300% (leverage 3.0), delta-neutral by construction.